Steve’s 3rd birthday

I wish I could seize the day
To be with you just for today
Although what I want is everyday
But for today, all I can say is Happy Birthday

Seandainya ku mampu menahan hari
Tuk ada di samping mu barang 1 hari
Walau yang ku mau itu seribu hari
Hari ini, ku hanya mampu ucapkan selamat ulang tahun

Andrew, Sorry I always miss your B-Day
Brugge, 27 June 2005

I've come home

Found it in the middle of my 'oret-oretan'
I think I made it in the end of 2002 or beginning of 2003..

I’m coming home…
The son who lost his way
Now back among the living
Lets take it back to the beginning

Father I’ve return
I’m sorry I was wrong
I feel so undeserving
After all I’ve done

I see Your open eyes
And I feel Your spirit rising on my chest
You’re the Father of forgiveness
I’ve come home

All I have is Yours
I don’t have much too give
But a heart that needs forgiving
The flesh is tired but the spirits willing

Father I’ve return
The one who left alone
You give me Your kingdom
And tell me it’s my own

I see Your open arms
I know I’ve found a place to rest
In the Father of forgiveness
I’ve come home

I’ve come home…

For Steve

For my youngest brother Steve

I wish there was a place to start again
Just blink and count to ten
In the land of beginning again

When no one knows the bad thing that you've done
The past is truly gone
In the land of beginning again

I love my brother more than my own life
We will play simple game
And all hard things are soft as rain

In the land of beginning again...

Andrew, made for my brother's birthday in 2004

Heart

.

Finally... After almost 2 months of works, my heart beat project is going to the right direction. Today I saw my heart in the computer screen...
Huhahaha... I can't stop laughing. It feel so good... Now I'm really
in a happy mood. Goodbye bad weekend... I don't really care anymore about my bike.
I'm glad I still have a heart, or at least a proper working heart.

Andrew, so happy and can't stop laughing...

Uncertain

Uncertainty… has no remedy
Like craving for a melody
From a voiceless symphony

Wordless… has no therapy
Don’t know what to say
In a temporary way

Lord, help me to find my remedy
Please give me Your therapy
And make me hear the beautiful symphony

Andrew, never knew I could feel so uncertain…
Sunday, June 19, 2005

Sunday

Sunday, what a terrible day…
Don’t know why it happened that day
Why can’t it be in other day?
Why in that bloody Sunday?

Can’t you pick another day?
Monday, Tuesday, or even Wednesday
Thanks, stadsweide in Enshede
You ruin my beautiful Sunday

Andrew, one bastard stole my lovely, full of memory bike
Sunday, June 19, 2005

Burning My Soul

A thorn in my side, a chip on my shoulder
A lump in my throat, the size of a boulder
The chill up my spine, can’t get any colder

I say it’s green and then you tell me it’s red
Keep your thoughts and ideas
Locked inside of your head

Twisting, turning
Losing all sense of yearning
Living and learning
The pressure keeps on burning my soul

Burning my soul...

Andrew, was in really bad mood yesterday

Ora che ho perso la vista ci vedo di più

Now that I'm blind, I can see much clearer

This sentence was in my head for a while.
Medically its a nonsense statement. But spiritually it isn't.
Have you ever tried to make yourself blind for a while?

Andrew, writing with a clear head. Udah gak error lagi.

'it(u)'

Don't know why, don't know how
Don't know where, don't know when

What can I, what should I?
How can I, how should I?
Where can I, where should I?
When can I, when should I?

Is this 'it'?
Am I in 'it'?

Tak tahu kenapa, tak tahu bagaimana
Tak tahu dimana, tak tahu kapan

Apa yang bisa ku, apa yang harus ku?
Bagaimana bisa ku, bagaimana harus ku?
Dimana bisa ku, dimana harus ku?
Kapan bisa ku, kapan harus ku?

Apakah ini 'itu'?
Apakah ku di dalam 'itu'?

Biar tambah error nih pake boso jowo sekalian

Ora ngerti opo, ora ngerti ngopo
Ora ngerti nang ndi, ora ngerti kapan

Opo sing iso aku, opo sing kudu ku?
Piye iso ku, piye kudu ku?
nang ngendi iso ku, nang ngendi kudu ku?
kapan iso ku, kapan kudu ku?

Opo iki 'iku'?
Opo aku nang njero 'iku'?

Nah lo tambah pusing aja kan bacanya.. hehehe
Andrew, yang lagi super error mikirin 'itu'.

Prelude

a prequel to Learning to Live

He seemed no different from the rest
Just a healthy normal boy
His mama always did her best
And he was daddy's pride and joy

He learned to walk and talk on time
But never cared much to be held
And steadily he would decline
Into his solitary shell

As a boy he was considered somewhat odd
Kept to himself most of the time
He would daydream in and out of his own world
But in every other way he was fine

He's a Monday morning lunatic
Disturbed from time to time
Lost within himself
In his solitary shell

A momentary maniac
With casual delusions
When will he be let out
Of his solitary shell

He struggled to get through his day
He was helplessly behind
He poured himself onto the page
Writing for hours at a time

He's a Monday morning lunatic
Disturbed from time to time
Lost within himself
In his solitary shell

A momentary maniac
With casual delusions
When will he be let out
Of his solitary shell